The role of jigeiko

I went to practice again today, full of energy as always.

I mentioned this in another blog entry before, but when I do jegeiko or shiai keiko, I often have a hard time doing ki-ken-tai no icchi; I just ended up throwing clumsy men strikes all over the place. It’s honestly so frustrating.

So lately, I’ve been telling myself to really focus and be extra mindful to finally get rid of this bad habit once and for all.

With that in mind, during today’s kihon practice, I paid close attention to my monouchi and my footwork while practicing men strikes.

If I were to grade myself in kihon practice, I’d say

Maybe not perfect, but compared to before, I really feel like my men strikes during kihon practice are getting much closer to ki-ken-tai no icchi. I used to struggle even in kihon practice, so this is progress for me.

After we finished the kihon keiko, sensei said to everybody, “Alright, let’s do some jigeiko.”

I thought to myself, okay, let’s keep this momentum going and really focus on ki-ken-tai no icchi even during jigeiko! I was super motivated.

And then, jigeiko started.

A little while in, I saw my moment and went for a men strike. But right at that instant, I felt my foot hit the floor before my strike landed.

And I thought, oh no… , Ahh… not again! I felt so disappointed.

Taking that failure into account, I told myself, okay, next time I’ll make sure to do ki-ken-tai no icchi! I tried to search for another opportunity for my attack, and then—this is it!—I struck again.

But once more, I felt it… oh no… I did it again… I can’t believe this…

Right then, sensei stopped the practice and said to me,

As I thought, oh right… that’s true…, but I also started to feel a bit conflicted.

Because I’m practicing with the goal of being able to strike with ki-ken-tai no icchi in jigeiko and shiai, I can’t help but evaluate myself in the middle of practice.

So the moment I strike, I end up asking myself, “How was that?”

And I believe that that’s the moment my movement loses its energy.

My main goal right now is to achieve ki-ken-tai no icchi in jigeiko and matches. But if I focus on that during jigeiko, I lose track of the feeling and I don’t fully commit and drive through my strikes.

Just then, humming to himself, Uncle Bob appeared.

Uncle Bob said,

Listen, Haru-chan. What I’m about to say is just my personal opinion, okay? There are many different ways of thinking, so just take this as one perspective.

You’ve been working really hard on ki-ken-tai no icchi lately, haven’t you? I practice with you every morning for ten minutes, so I know that well.

But maybe you should stop going into jigeiko thinking, I have to make everything perfectly unified.

Yes, I know. And that’s a goal you absolutely need to achieve. I’ll keep supporting you too.

You need to rethink the role of jigeiko.

In other words, what is jigeiko really for?

Jigeiko isn’t for checking fine details of body mechanics.

Jigeiko is practice where you give everything you have and face your opponent head-on.　

Before starting jigeiko, you first raise your ki as much as you possibly can and focus your mind,right?

At the same time, you feel your opponent so deeply that it’s almost like you’ve possessed them. Then, the moment you recognize, “This is it!”, you throw yourself at your opponent with everything you’ve got. Haru-chan is trying to aim for that too, right?

At that moment, you don’t stop to check how you’re doing. Because when you’re going all out like that, there’s no way you could also analyze what’s happening at the same time.

If you can analyze while doing it… that probably means you are not paying attention to what you are feeling at an energy level, which is much more important during jigeiko. That’s how it seemed today, Haru-chan.

In other words, repetitive practice for learning movements and techniques, and checking whether you can do them correctly, shouldn’t be your priority during jigeiko. Those should be done during scripted practice – things like suburi, kihon keiko, kendo kata, or your self-practice with me. And you can practice these as much as you possibly can.

And how much is “as much as you possibly can”? That means practicing so much in scripted practice that, in unscripted jigeiko or matches, the correct movements come out naturally and unconsciously. Until that happens, there’s no shortcut—you just have to keep practicing under scripted conditions until it sticks.

Do you understand, Haru-chan?　Phew—after talking non-stop, my jaw’s getting tired…

If I take a step back and organize my thoughts, it basically comes down to this…

At my current level, it’s probably only natural that even if I repeat jigeiko over and over, everything I do ends up lacking ki-ken-tai no icchi.

It might not be perfect…, but it can’t be helped. That’s where I am right now.

But even so, when I face an opponent, I should still be able to raise my spirit, truly feel my opponent, and, in the moment I believe in, commit fully to my strike and follow through with it. At least… I think I can.

So for now, even if I can’t achieve ki-ken-tai no icchi the way I want, if I can do jigeiko with a strong spirit and full intention, then for now… 🌸that’s okay🌸. I need to be careful not to get too discouraged and let my spirit fall apart just because I’m not there yet.

And once I accept where I am, I just have to keep working steadily—using all kinds of scripted practice separately from jigeiko—and continue practicing patiently until I can do what I currently can’t. No giving up.

Hmm… I see.

Somehow, it feels like the fog I had this morning has completely lifted!

In the end, what I really need to think about again is this:

What should be my mindset and objectives for scripted practices?

What should be my mindset and objectives for unscripted practices like jigeiko?

That’s what it comes down to, I guess…

As usual, it looks like a long road ahead… but this time, I’m really fired up!

Alright! I’m going to do this!
Perfect ki-ken-tai no icchi—just you wait!

Thank you, Uncle Bob!

And with that, I’m off to practice again tomorrow—making sure I don’t oversleep!